On Jan. 17, Glass recently wrote a blog about how stay-at-home moms do not have the same value as women who work. ( http://thoughtcatalog.com/amy-glass/2014/01/i-look-down-on-young-women-with-husbands-and-kids-and-im-not-sorry/ )
Dear Amy Glass,
I would like to straighten out a few misconceptions for you. I don’t know your mother or you personally, but as a mom I decided that maybe YOU need to be mothered right now.
There has been a lot of “talk” online and lots of people are angry with you (and I was, too) and what you said about stay-at-home mothers :
“Do people really think that a stay at home mom is really on equal footing with a woman who works and takes care of herself? There’s no way those two things are the same. It’s hard for me to believe it’s not just verbally placating these people so they don’t get in trouble with the mommy bloggers.”
To answer your question: yes, I am on equal footing because I not only care for myself but I have to care for and raise men and women. And, no my dear, it is not the same. It is harder.
A good mother is a teacher, and you need to be taught. You need to be straightened out and shown the error in your ways. You need a timeout (from blogging) to think about what you have said.
It’s exhausting to correct ignorant people, but we mothers are used to that. And we see that as an investment into society as a whole to help shine light and guide selfish little people back on the right path. I do this all day for my children, and I am happy to help you as well. A couple useful tips:
Think of others/walk a mile in their shoes: It might be hard to imagine what it is like to be a fulltime, stay-at-home wife and mother, a generally thankless task that is only rewarded with the pride and accomplishment of raising a decent, well adjusted man or woman and a long and happy marriage. (When you look around your workplace, or any interaction with others, take a moment and see the lame, selfish people in your world who get paid about the same as you or more and are big lazy a-holes. Those people might not have had moms who took their enormous jobs seriously. Or maybe they ignored their mom’s advice.)
I remember having stay-at-home mom friends when I was working and I ignorantly thought that my demanding job was so hard because I had a boss and I could get fired. The thing is, when you work outside the home, you don’t get a lunch break, coffee breaks, accolades and raises.
If I thought that is ALL you did when you work outside the home, I would be just as ignorant. I know what it is like to work in an office and have to deal with people not doing their jobs, stress of performing well, demanding bosses and the risk and fear of not having a job at all. You said: "women will be equal with men when we stop demanding that it be equally important to do housework and do real work. They are not equal. Doing laundry will never be as important as being a doctor or an engineer or building a business. This word play is holding us back."
Be thankful/use your manners: Good mothers can make or break the backbone of society. We care and invest in people from our own children to our grandparents. Recently, The Daily Mail Online ran a story on how society suffers with an unbalanced amount of women working outside the home:
" Families remain central to the care of the old and sick, as well as raising the next generation.… Yet our economy and society steer ever more educated women away from marriage or childbearing. The repercussions for our futures are enormous."
So you might not understand what it’s like to be a stay-at-home mom, that is OK. Just say “Thank You” for our contribution to society. It’s good manners.
Maybe this video will help you see a little bit what its like to be a mom: http://www.godvine.com/Honor-All-Mothers-by-Watching-and-Sharing-This-Incredible-Tribute-4308.html
The bottom line is, it is intellectually ignorant of you to say stay-at-home moms have less value than what, a blogger? What investment have you made into the future?
No blogging young lady until you can be more responsible (and factual) with your words.
WE VALUE ALL MOTHERS: WRITE US!
I want to celebrate mothers after this ugly, ignorant attack. I want to thank those who struggle with blood, sweat and tears everyday to care for an investment that we rarely get to see the full reward on until we are old and gray.
Please, moms of all kinds, submit your stories about your value and place in this world and BOLDER Bands will randomly pick and post them on our website and send those of you we pick a FREE BOLDER BAND HEADBAND to help you look good while you are working or working out. Keep your tales to about 200 words.
~Amy Crouse
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